I got the tooth out on Monday. I hated doing it but it is what he wanted. I will post a pic tomorrow. The root was huge, I doubt it would have come out on its own. Since the extraction his adult tooth has been moving forward. It is crazy to see the change day to day.
Tonight FINALLY the thunderstorms came. I feel better now. Plus my garden gets watered. ( i love planting, pruning, and gardening but hate watering.) My inner water conservationist is at conflict with my gardener. (donn has brain washed me!)
Friday, May 30, 2008
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Mommy Resume
Among the many skills that I have acquired in my career as a mother I am now adding Amature Dentist.
You may remember a few months back I posted the monkey's front tooth that is coming in shark style (behind the still intact baby tooth). Well that baby tooth was not budging. I gave the monkey time to try to work it out on his own since he is terrified at the idea of a shot in his mouth. Finally I made the executive decision to call the dentist. I made an appointment for the extraction but did not tell the wee man about it. A few days later wee man came to it on his own that we should call the dentist, I later found out he was not completely convinced of his idea.
I did end up taking the monkey to the dentist, unfortunately it did not go as planned. He freaked out. It was frustrating because I just wanted to get it over with. He asked me to pull his tooth out because he really didn't want the shot and did not want to go to a dentist that he didn't know (a pediatric dentist).
Ok, I need to mention here that I was kind of peeved at my dentist during this visit. After I told the monkey that he was going to be getting his tooth pulled today and we dropped his sister off at a friends house, I told him I would be in the room with him - holding his hand or feet and sing to him if we wants. We talked about not looking at the shot and that it would not really hurt. We were waiting in the dentist office for our turn and they came and told the monkey it was his turn. We both stood up to go in and he walked on with the hygienist and the dentist stepped in front of me and told me to wait out here. I tried to tell her that he had had a traumatizing dental experience when he was three that he very much remembers and was anxious about this visit. She informed me that things go better without the parents which I understand but I told him I would be in there with him and they didn't let me talk to him about it. I found the poor communication with myself and my son disappointing and slightly infuriating.
Back to my career as an amature dentist. The monkey was serious when he asked me to pull his tooth out so that afternoon I got to work while watching noggin for a distraction. A yank here, a twist there, then I really put some weight into it and leveraged against his other tooth and *snap* part of whatever was keeping the tooth stuck gave. He yelped for a minute then looked at me and said "that was a good one mom!"
We are still working on it but it will come it seems.... soon. We will keep you posted.
You may remember a few months back I posted the monkey's front tooth that is coming in shark style (behind the still intact baby tooth). Well that baby tooth was not budging. I gave the monkey time to try to work it out on his own since he is terrified at the idea of a shot in his mouth. Finally I made the executive decision to call the dentist. I made an appointment for the extraction but did not tell the wee man about it. A few days later wee man came to it on his own that we should call the dentist, I later found out he was not completely convinced of his idea.
I did end up taking the monkey to the dentist, unfortunately it did not go as planned. He freaked out. It was frustrating because I just wanted to get it over with. He asked me to pull his tooth out because he really didn't want the shot and did not want to go to a dentist that he didn't know (a pediatric dentist).
Ok, I need to mention here that I was kind of peeved at my dentist during this visit. After I told the monkey that he was going to be getting his tooth pulled today and we dropped his sister off at a friends house, I told him I would be in the room with him - holding his hand or feet and sing to him if we wants. We talked about not looking at the shot and that it would not really hurt. We were waiting in the dentist office for our turn and they came and told the monkey it was his turn. We both stood up to go in and he walked on with the hygienist and the dentist stepped in front of me and told me to wait out here. I tried to tell her that he had had a traumatizing dental experience when he was three that he very much remembers and was anxious about this visit. She informed me that things go better without the parents which I understand but I told him I would be in there with him and they didn't let me talk to him about it. I found the poor communication with myself and my son disappointing and slightly infuriating.
Back to my career as an amature dentist. The monkey was serious when he asked me to pull his tooth out so that afternoon I got to work while watching noggin for a distraction. A yank here, a twist there, then I really put some weight into it and leveraged against his other tooth and *snap* part of whatever was keeping the tooth stuck gave. He yelped for a minute then looked at me and said "that was a good one mom!"
We are still working on it but it will come it seems.... soon. We will keep you posted.
Monday, May 19, 2008
ebay phobic and big daddy steps in.
right now my young boy is into Heroscape
i found him the marvel set on clearance and he and his dad decided they needed a bigger set to play. i researched it and found the Master Set.
ok, so we really want to buy it but we could not find it in town. so smart big daddy checked it out on ebay AND WE WON IT!
i am an ebay phobe big time but it was so exciting to watch it down to the clock (which apparently you are not supposed to do)
ROCK ON!
ps. we are buying it because the monkey is getting a tooth pulled on wednesday. poor guy. but he is being a mini man about it.
i found him the marvel set on clearance and he and his dad decided they needed a bigger set to play. i researched it and found the Master Set.
ok, so we really want to buy it but we could not find it in town. so smart big daddy checked it out on ebay AND WE WON IT!
i am an ebay phobe big time but it was so exciting to watch it down to the clock (which apparently you are not supposed to do)
ROCK ON!
ps. we are buying it because the monkey is getting a tooth pulled on wednesday. poor guy. but he is being a mini man about it.
Laugh With Me
The other day I went out to eat with my friend her young teenage boy and the bean. We were chatting along then somehow the conversation got on the topic of my amazonian self.
My darling friend said very casually "yeah, you're an amazon."
My reply "yup, I am."
I love this woman for her frankness and comfort with such topics (body issues are just the tip of the iceberg). She has had body issues in the past and has embraced herself. Being around her and some other women lately who do not have social hang ups with talking about size weight and other body issues has been liberating. She realized that she did not want to be the thin woman or the woman with smaller boobs. Her body is beautiful and I will joke with her about her small ass any day.
Some folks in the past have tried to prescribe a "fix" or share their tips to a flatter tummy and a perky ass. With all their good intentions I am not looking to be fixed or told "no, your not big." I understand this response it is the socially acceptable thing to do and say. Unfortunately to me it seems like a washed out conversation. Why not say "yeah, you're a big girl. your husband loves your cottage cheese butt. work it."
If I really wanted to I would eat minimally and work out frantically and I could look like those airbrushed women that most strive for. I did work hard for that ideal body when I was 13 and ended up with a slimmer body and an eating disorder. I was so body obsessed in early college that I could hardly go out socially or to classes sometimes because I didn't look the way I wanted (fearing others judgment or ridicule heard and unheard- a kind of anthrophobia) . I am done with that. My body is a big part of who I was and who I am. (lol)
I am an almost six foot woman of Swedish and Scottish decent who packs a soft 218 lbs. When I talk about my size, or crack a joke about it I am not being self deprecating I am embracing it in my own backwards way. Laugh with me don't tell me to stop, or walk away with your fingers in your ears singing "LALALA - I don't hear you".
I do not want my daughter to idealize anything but her healthy self big or small. I do not want my son to have a limited view of femininity and beauty.
Laugh with me people, I am big and beautiful.
My darling friend said very casually "yeah, you're an amazon."
My reply "yup, I am."
I love this woman for her frankness and comfort with such topics (body issues are just the tip of the iceberg). She has had body issues in the past and has embraced herself. Being around her and some other women lately who do not have social hang ups with talking about size weight and other body issues has been liberating. She realized that she did not want to be the thin woman or the woman with smaller boobs. Her body is beautiful and I will joke with her about her small ass any day.
Some folks in the past have tried to prescribe a "fix" or share their tips to a flatter tummy and a perky ass. With all their good intentions I am not looking to be fixed or told "no, your not big." I understand this response it is the socially acceptable thing to do and say. Unfortunately to me it seems like a washed out conversation. Why not say "yeah, you're a big girl. your husband loves your cottage cheese butt. work it."
If I really wanted to I would eat minimally and work out frantically and I could look like those airbrushed women that most strive for. I did work hard for that ideal body when I was 13 and ended up with a slimmer body and an eating disorder. I was so body obsessed in early college that I could hardly go out socially or to classes sometimes because I didn't look the way I wanted (fearing others judgment or ridicule heard and unheard- a kind of anthrophobia) . I am done with that. My body is a big part of who I was and who I am. (lol)
I am an almost six foot woman of Swedish and Scottish decent who packs a soft 218 lbs. When I talk about my size, or crack a joke about it I am not being self deprecating I am embracing it in my own backwards way. Laugh with me don't tell me to stop, or walk away with your fingers in your ears singing "LALALA - I don't hear you".
I do not want my daughter to idealize anything but her healthy self big or small. I do not want my son to have a limited view of femininity and beauty.
Laugh with me people, I am big and beautiful.
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Think Global, Birth Local
(editorial from the new issue of The Birth Project Issue VI Spring 2008)
This spring ACOG (American College of Obstetrics and Gynocology) released their updated statement on home birth (reprinted on pg. 12), generally reiterating that they oppose homebirth as well as individuals and organizations who offer or support such options for women and families. We have a few great articles responding to this ACOG statement. This statement is not supported by much of the research; in contrast, research shows that homebirth and freestanding birth centers are statistically safe and actually produce better outcomes overall.
Also this spring many meetings were held by home birth midwives and those who support them discussing The Big Push for Midwives (see pg. 26 for web link), debating the future of midwifery in the United States. Check out their website for more information about the issues around the legislating midwives. Some are in favor of this movement towards “legalization” and some are against it. There are members of the “medical” community opposed to anything that would support homebirth options but also within the homebirth community some see legislation not as progress but as restriction on their practice and how they are able to serve women and families.
What most people don’t realize is that in some states the right to make the decision to birth at home and birth centers have been taken away from women and families. As seen on Good Morning America on January 2008 unassisted homebirth is something that women are turning to when they cannot find a midwife to attend to them at home. Some also make the decision to have an unassisted homebirth in areas where midwives are available for personal or sometimes financial reasons since homebirth care is usually paid out of pocket. Like other women’s reproductive rights issues, we need to ask: should it be a case of choice, availability and safety? One would think...
On the internet many bloggers are also discussing/debating these hot birth topics and more. There is a buzz of something going on. We are talking about it too, here in The Birth Project.
Most think or assume that birth and birth culture is fine and dandy (more or less outside of the fear of pain that the majority of women have). Many times I end up having conversations about birth with expecting parents, in either doula consultations or in my childbirth education class, friends and family, or even sometimes strangers (although I don’t go out of my way to get on this topic with strangers, it just sometimes comes up). I can see it in their faces that they are realizing that birth, birth culture, birthing decisions, and birth politics are not fine and dandy. They are complicated, multi-layered, politically charged shades of gray, with the eye of the storm - mothers, babies and their families, usually unaware of the huge conflict spinning around them. There are issues- health care issues, human rights issues, women’s rights issues, safety issues, ethical issues, legal issues, psychological issues, emotional issues, physical issues, even environmental issues.
~
One of the many books on my reading list this spring is actually not about birth. It is Animal, Vegetable, Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver. It makes a ”passionate case for putting the kitchen back at the center of family life and diversified farms at the center of the American diet”. This book speaks to the idea of eating local and seasonal to, among other things, reduce one’s carbon footprint. So what do agricultural sustainability, and carbon footprints have to do with birth politics you ask?
It is all about how we live and think. Like sustainable agriculture, birth is about business. If we eat more local and seasonal it causes economical issues for the businesses (corporate farms, trucking, packaging, etc.) and employees of those businesses that grow and transport food all over the world. On the flip side local farmers, markets, dairies etc. would be more supported. If more women birth at home or in birth centers a large portion of hospital revenue will take a economical hit along with the companies that make and distribute much of the equipment used at hospital births as well as the income of the doctors that do deliveries in the hospitals. Again on the flip side community midwives would be supported and if the demand were higher for these birth settings momentum could be made for insurance coverage and more accessibility for all who seek alternative birth options, potentially reducing insurance premiums. The waste byproduct from the equipment and apparati at hospital births is many times that of home and birth centers. So again, it is also an environmental issue - reducing the human carbon footprint.
On this beautiful spring-y day (finally!) I ask you to open your mind to the big picture. Think big and also with empathy for the whole picture on both sides. The only way we can hope to move forward is to work together (see the well written open letter to ACOG on page 13). I also ask you to incorporate this kind of thinking to other aspects of your life - how you eat, if you recycle, speak of politics, how you parent, and so on.
Act with thought and empathy for all.
We are dedicating this issue to midwives since May 5th is National Midwife Day. If you have had a midwife in your life and feel so inclined, send her a letter of appreciation this May. It is hard, amazing work that these women take on ~ send them some love to help get through that next sleepless night. The month of May is also International Doula month so send them warm fuzzies too.
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
Life and Death
One of my life obsessions and fears is death. It may be why I work in birth and have a desire to do hospice work at some point in my life.
The collection of photographs is by German photographer Walter Schels, 72 Faces of Life and Death is a beautiful window into a part of our existence that most choose not to think about. There is a link at the end of this article where you can view some portraits from the collection. What a fascinating project.
The collection of photographs is by German photographer Walter Schels, 72 Faces of Life and Death is a beautiful window into a part of our existence that most choose not to think about. There is a link at the end of this article where you can view some portraits from the collection. What a fascinating project.
Sunday, April 06, 2008
Dare I say "childfree"???
It was recently brought to my attention a blog thread debating about "childfree". Read it here
Since the comments were closed I thought I would share my thoughts here.
First regarding the taxes for schooling issue: I homeschool my kids and I happily pay my taxes for the schools that we are not using because the kids that use those schools will some day be adults. Adults that will be most likely join the work force and be paying taxes into social security that I will (hopefully) someday get. These children will grow up to be adults that may become the nurses that wipe my ass if I become old and need assistance or maybe they will just come and sit with me and chat in the home (I hope I do not end up in a home but it could happen- you never know). The fact of the matter is that even the "childfree" adults reaped the benefit of taxes for schooling as children going through the school system.
Second regarding the infertility treatments: This one seems really out of left field. From the information I have most infertility treatment is NOT covered by insurance, it is an out of pocket cost for the desire to have children. When infertility treatments may be covered by insurance and you are concerned about it bringing up your insurance cost- it can be equated to my insurance costs being higher to support that cost of people who need extensive medical care because they choose to eat like shit their whole lives and not take care of themselves. I try to eat healthy, take care of myself and rarely use the medical system or pharmaceuticals. It is a crap shoot when dealing with private insurance. Fat unhealthy people ore more of a problem than folks who choose infertility treatment - other than the fact that once conditions usually takes a person out of the population and the other can add a person to the population.
Third regarding the cost of Childbirth: Ha ha ha... where do I start? I totally agree that the cost of childbirth in this country is disgusting. I am a birth activist and a birth worker and could really expand on this but I will keep it short. Childbirth is major revenue for most hospitals. As with most things it is a business and a business that makes $$$. I agree that it should not be about $$$ and about proper health care but like the second point I take a chance when I get insurance coverage that I am paying for a lot of shit for a lot of other folks that I have no control over. I had my second child at home and paid for it out of my own pocket a whole whopping $2000 (that is for prenatal, birth through 3-4 postpartum visits) for amazing care. More thorough, attentive and personal care than I got "in the system" with my first birth which the birth alone was $6000 (i cannot imagine how much the total was with prenatals, testing, ultrasounds, and that one postpartum visit). This is a ten year old article but not too much has changed in ten years and what has changes is not for the better - birth centers closing, the c-section rate going up to 30% and womens choices being taken away. Choices that would lower overall childbirth costs.
Fourth the pity factor: I do not pity you at all. The "childfree" have a freedom I do not have. They do not have the weight of raising another human being not to be an asshole. They do not have the stress of fighting with little irrational people. That is your choice and right as a "childfree" person and I would not change a damn thing about my life and the choices I made to have my children. I was pitied by my "childfree" friends when I had my unexpected child at 25 but from a distance. It was hard and it sucked and no one was there to help me. I am very aware of the "childfree" culture. I have changed diapers in the front seat of cars with the door open for room in hail storms because the bathroom did not have a changing table, I have breast fed my child on a toilet in a restaurant, I have gotten looks of contempt for taking my quiet well behaved children places, among other things. So you get no pity here and I do feel that most of you that feel pitied are being a little too sensitive - be a duck and let it roll off your back if they pity you then it is their ignorance. Let it go.
Fifth in regards to the "you had ‘em, they are your problem, expect nothing from me, and by-the-way, could you make them shut up?": This made me think of when I went out to brunch with some friends of mine (with out quiet well behaved children - we were armed with mini princesses to distract them) and a few tables over there was a family with an adult that was mentally impaired that had tendencies of turrets. This person was loud at times, very loud. I thought it was great that these folks could go out as a family including that special needs family member. Should I have interrupted this family and asked them to "shut up" their special needs adult member for the sake of my perfect civilized brunch experience? Do I mind that I pay into their health care needs? Do I not hold the door open for them as it takes them three times as long to get out the door because they are also disabled? We must remember that our culture generally looks on our elderly as we look at our children. Should I say to the "childfree" "expect nothing from me or mine as you get older and may need assistance, and by-the-way wipe your own ass"?And as for myself, I expect nothing but the same patience and understanding for myself and my child that you would offer any other human being.
This debate reminds me of my thoughts on vegans (sorry if i offend any vegans out there). We are privileged to live in a society that we have the opportunity to be so picky and opinionated about what we and others eat. Many places you eat what you have or die be it rice or rat. We are also privileged to live in a society that we can have such idealistic and lofty separatist ideas of family and society. Many places you would live in a 900 square foot house with your parents, aunts, grandparents and other extended family breeders and "childfree" alike working towards sustaining.
I did find many of the comments on the original blog post ill-founded generalizations and misinformed. I do not care if you are "childfree" that is your choice so live your "childfree" life but do not do things like go to the Corner Brewery (a family friendly brew pub) and bitch about kids being there. You have every other bar in town that is not family friendly. The "childfree" have the majority of public places built to their needs not mine as a breeder. We do not live in a family friendly culture.
I need to go garden now while my crotch droppings and the neighbors crotch droppings play delightfully together. Have a lovely Sunday.
Since the comments were closed I thought I would share my thoughts here.
First regarding the taxes for schooling issue: I homeschool my kids and I happily pay my taxes for the schools that we are not using because the kids that use those schools will some day be adults. Adults that will be most likely join the work force and be paying taxes into social security that I will (hopefully) someday get. These children will grow up to be adults that may become the nurses that wipe my ass if I become old and need assistance or maybe they will just come and sit with me and chat in the home (I hope I do not end up in a home but it could happen- you never know). The fact of the matter is that even the "childfree" adults reaped the benefit of taxes for schooling as children going through the school system.
Second regarding the infertility treatments: This one seems really out of left field. From the information I have most infertility treatment is NOT covered by insurance, it is an out of pocket cost for the desire to have children. When infertility treatments may be covered by insurance and you are concerned about it bringing up your insurance cost- it can be equated to my insurance costs being higher to support that cost of people who need extensive medical care because they choose to eat like shit their whole lives and not take care of themselves. I try to eat healthy, take care of myself and rarely use the medical system or pharmaceuticals. It is a crap shoot when dealing with private insurance. Fat unhealthy people ore more of a problem than folks who choose infertility treatment - other than the fact that once conditions usually takes a person out of the population and the other can add a person to the population.
Third regarding the cost of Childbirth: Ha ha ha... where do I start? I totally agree that the cost of childbirth in this country is disgusting. I am a birth activist and a birth worker and could really expand on this but I will keep it short. Childbirth is major revenue for most hospitals. As with most things it is a business and a business that makes $$$. I agree that it should not be about $$$ and about proper health care but like the second point I take a chance when I get insurance coverage that I am paying for a lot of shit for a lot of other folks that I have no control over. I had my second child at home and paid for it out of my own pocket a whole whopping $2000 (that is for prenatal, birth through 3-4 postpartum visits) for amazing care. More thorough, attentive and personal care than I got "in the system" with my first birth which the birth alone was $6000 (i cannot imagine how much the total was with prenatals, testing, ultrasounds, and that one postpartum visit). This is a ten year old article but not too much has changed in ten years and what has changes is not for the better - birth centers closing, the c-section rate going up to 30% and womens choices being taken away. Choices that would lower overall childbirth costs.
Fourth the pity factor: I do not pity you at all. The "childfree" have a freedom I do not have. They do not have the weight of raising another human being not to be an asshole. They do not have the stress of fighting with little irrational people. That is your choice and right as a "childfree" person and I would not change a damn thing about my life and the choices I made to have my children. I was pitied by my "childfree" friends when I had my unexpected child at 25 but from a distance. It was hard and it sucked and no one was there to help me. I am very aware of the "childfree" culture. I have changed diapers in the front seat of cars with the door open for room in hail storms because the bathroom did not have a changing table, I have breast fed my child on a toilet in a restaurant, I have gotten looks of contempt for taking my quiet well behaved children places, among other things. So you get no pity here and I do feel that most of you that feel pitied are being a little too sensitive - be a duck and let it roll off your back if they pity you then it is their ignorance. Let it go.
Fifth in regards to the "you had ‘em, they are your problem, expect nothing from me, and by-the-way, could you make them shut up?": This made me think of when I went out to brunch with some friends of mine (with out quiet well behaved children - we were armed with mini princesses to distract them) and a few tables over there was a family with an adult that was mentally impaired that had tendencies of turrets. This person was loud at times, very loud. I thought it was great that these folks could go out as a family including that special needs family member. Should I have interrupted this family and asked them to "shut up" their special needs adult member for the sake of my perfect civilized brunch experience? Do I mind that I pay into their health care needs? Do I not hold the door open for them as it takes them three times as long to get out the door because they are also disabled? We must remember that our culture generally looks on our elderly as we look at our children. Should I say to the "childfree" "expect nothing from me or mine as you get older and may need assistance, and by-the-way wipe your own ass"?And as for myself, I expect nothing but the same patience and understanding for myself and my child that you would offer any other human being.
This debate reminds me of my thoughts on vegans (sorry if i offend any vegans out there). We are privileged to live in a society that we have the opportunity to be so picky and opinionated about what we and others eat. Many places you eat what you have or die be it rice or rat. We are also privileged to live in a society that we can have such idealistic and lofty separatist ideas of family and society. Many places you would live in a 900 square foot house with your parents, aunts, grandparents and other extended family breeders and "childfree" alike working towards sustaining.
I did find many of the comments on the original blog post ill-founded generalizations and misinformed. I do not care if you are "childfree" that is your choice so live your "childfree" life but do not do things like go to the Corner Brewery (a family friendly brew pub) and bitch about kids being there. You have every other bar in town that is not family friendly. The "childfree" have the majority of public places built to their needs not mine as a breeder. We do not live in a family friendly culture.
I need to go garden now while my crotch droppings and the neighbors crotch droppings play delightfully together. Have a lovely Sunday.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
family friendly culture
This came to me on one of my email lists. Find the full article here. This is yet another grand example of how ridiculously un-mother-child-friendly our culture is.
A Maryland judge sentenced a breastfeeding mother to a night in jail or a $150 fine, after she asked to postpone her jury duty.
Elizabeth Jett's baby boy Henry was less than 12 weeks old when she was called for jury duty. "I think it's a case of priorities. Taking care of your children should be your first priority. Jury duty can always come later," Jett said.
Jett asked to postpone and serve during the Summer, when Henry would be older and her mother, a full-time teacher, could take care of him and his five-year-old brother.
The Carroll County judge said Jett was in contempt of court, which Jett thought was unbelievable. "I was just shocked. I couldn't even put it into words," she said.
Legislation that would allow nursing mothers with children under the age of two to be excused from jury duty was introduced for the second time. When the plan was proposed in 2004, many lawmakers shot it down.
Brian Frosh, Chair for the Maryland Senate Judicial Proceedings Committee, said the law would cause more people to try to postpone their duties, "If you start saying, we're gonna excuse people for breastfeeding, you've gotta say ok to kidney dialysis, chemotherapy and all the other maladies that afflict the human condition."
Frosh said the law already gives judges broad discretion to excuse residents from jury duty, "So what we want is for judges to use their discretion liberally."
As for Elizabeth Jett, she has since asked for a waiver, because she can't afford the fine. The judge in the case, Barry Hughes, did not want to comment. The jury commissioner hung up on Andrea McCarren, as soon as she identified herself as a reporter.
In the state of Maryland there is an exception for members of the military:
Are members of the military exempt from jury service?
There is no automatic exemption for members of the federal or state military services. You may claim such an exemption if your jury service on the date requested would unreasonably interfere with the performance of military duties or affect adversely the readiness of the military unit. The form certifying these requirements must be completed by the commanding officer or supervisor of the person requesting exemption.
In the state of Maryland there is an exemption for employers (i guess if your job is important enough):
A Maryland judge sentenced a breastfeeding mother to a night in jail or a $150 fine, after she asked to postpone her jury duty.
Elizabeth Jett's baby boy Henry was less than 12 weeks old when she was called for jury duty. "I think it's a case of priorities. Taking care of your children should be your first priority. Jury duty can always come later," Jett said.
Jett asked to postpone and serve during the Summer, when Henry would be older and her mother, a full-time teacher, could take care of him and his five-year-old brother.
The Carroll County judge said Jett was in contempt of court, which Jett thought was unbelievable. "I was just shocked. I couldn't even put it into words," she said.
Legislation that would allow nursing mothers with children under the age of two to be excused from jury duty was introduced for the second time. When the plan was proposed in 2004, many lawmakers shot it down.
Brian Frosh, Chair for the Maryland Senate Judicial Proceedings Committee, said the law would cause more people to try to postpone their duties, "If you start saying, we're gonna excuse people for breastfeeding, you've gotta say ok to kidney dialysis, chemotherapy and all the other maladies that afflict the human condition."
Frosh said the law already gives judges broad discretion to excuse residents from jury duty, "So what we want is for judges to use their discretion liberally."
As for Elizabeth Jett, she has since asked for a waiver, because she can't afford the fine. The judge in the case, Barry Hughes, did not want to comment. The jury commissioner hung up on Andrea McCarren, as soon as she identified herself as a reporter.
In the state of Maryland there is an exception for members of the military:
Are members of the military exempt from jury service?
There is no automatic exemption for members of the federal or state military services. You may claim such an exemption if your jury service on the date requested would unreasonably interfere with the performance of military duties or affect adversely the readiness of the military unit. The form certifying these requirements must be completed by the commanding officer or supervisor of the person requesting exemption.
In the state of Maryland there is an exemption for employers (i guess if your job is important enough):
The date on which my employee is to report for service is one when we absolutely need the employee's services. What can be done?
The period for jury duty can be adjusted, with some restrictions. If your employee is called for jury service on a date not good for your business, most jurisdictions will allow the employee to re-set the date to report for service. You may be asked to document by letter the reason for the postponement. While one postponement usually will be granted, the employee will be expected to be available on the re-set date.
A request for postponement should be made as early as possible. The court will have less flexibility to grant postponements as the day of actual jury service approaches
~
As of July 2007 twelve states have statutes specifically addressing breastfeeding and jury duty. Here is a document put together by Melissa R. Vance, JD, Legal Advisory Council on Breastfeeding and Jury Duty.
Here is a website that promotes family-friendly jury duty legislation. One step towards making a family friendly culture.
On that note and completely off the topic of jury duty I want to give many thanks to our local watering hole The Corner Brewery for a family friendly pub! I know it has meant so much to so many families in this area to have a place to go and have a pint with some friends without having to stress about "who are we going to find to babysit the kids???" Thank you.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
it is almost april and...
we are expecting 3-6 inches of snow tonight. (one for the road eh?) a good excuse to get the fireplace fired up (lol).
today i got my house professionally cleaned!!!! i love barter. i believe it is the way to go. if anything it has been totally worth going to massage school to be able to barter for cleaning, painting, computers, coffee, you name it.
not only are my bathrooms renovated (wall paper gone and painted) but they are CLEAN.
there is something so beautiful about a clean that someone else did along with food that someone else cooked.
and it is scrabble night! yay!
today i got my house professionally cleaned!!!! i love barter. i believe it is the way to go. if anything it has been totally worth going to massage school to be able to barter for cleaning, painting, computers, coffee, you name it.
not only are my bathrooms renovated (wall paper gone and painted) but they are CLEAN.
there is something so beautiful about a clean that someone else did along with food that someone else cooked.
and it is scrabble night! yay!
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
victoria secret nursing bras???
why do i find this disturbing?
ok, let me clarify. i LOVE that bra and almost (but not really) wishes i was still nursing so i could buy this bra. and i am so excited that victorias secret is hopping on the band wagon for supporting (lol) breastfeeding mothers. but can we get some real models please?
would it be that hard to get a model that we could not see her ribs? this is not am image that new mothers need to be inundated wtih when looking for a sexy nursing bra. and yes i said sexy.. like smokin hot. i personally want mamas to feel sexy and smokin'
postpartum in usually their plumper than usual selves.also how does this help those mamas who are nursing and need to eat 300-400 more calories than they did when they were pregnant growing that baby. looking at this photo evokes the desire to sustain on water and cigarettes personally speaking.
wait a minute here is super model cindy crawford who DID have kids and proudly shows the badge of motherhood - stretch marks. i grabbed this image from this news blip. unfortunately the had to say "Unsightly: Cindy Crawford's stretch marks" under a super close up of her belly. i say rock on cindy crawford for wearing your bikini!
on a side note i would love to take a photo of this news organizations editors ass and do a close up on their unsightly butt pimples and cellulite and write about it in people magazine. for real.
if you have never checked it out here is the real Shape of a Mother.
what is blogging?
looking back i have taken a bit of the lazy woman's blogging style as of late. so here i am back in full force.
i am trudging through putting the next issue of The Birth Project together. i am trying a few new layout options (get a copy and check it out!) and i am dealing with temporarily not having access to the software i need on our new-to-us-used computer. i may mention here that i love and rely on technology but i hate it so. it makes my skin crawl. we have some really great pieces this time around. it will once again be a super "eeeeekkkkk" moment of excitement when we pick it up from out super awesome local printer.
the monkey has been getting nightly phone calls from a new friend of his that lives about a half hour from us, so we dont see them often enough, and the boys talk about their band that they are going to start. tonight it was decided that they will not form until christmas but will practice until then. it was absolutely adorable to eves drop on their conversation. the monkey was so geeked to be getting phone calls and it seems that this may become a nightly ritual. so cool. oh, the monkey is the drummer btw. sweet!
i measured the kids the other day and the bean has grown about an inch and a half since january. mind you in january i splurged and took the bean to value world and got her a garbage bag of new-to-her clothes and some of them are already too short. damn skippy! luckily i was prepared and bought some pants to roll up for now so they will fit in the fall. smart cookie i am.
on the homeschooling front- i swear february through april are a wash for me every year. i find also when i teach at work i am lack luster this time of year also. hmmmm..... maybe i am a bear and need to hibernate through these dreary months of torture. mind you we are having a record snow year for the first time since 1880 and it is supposed to snow this weekend (***sniffle***sniffle***tear runs down cheek) i am so done with this and so are the kiddos. we are all bouncing off the walls and dreaming of digging in the dirt (the beans favorite animal is the beloved worm) and growing and eating beautiful heirloom vegetables.
funny story: last week the kids had a big and the monkey threw up once (poor monkey) but it was the middle of the night and he saw it coming and mindfully asked for a bucket to have next to him just in case (always thinking ahead, that kid). when it did occur he was sleeping on the floor (he sleeps on the floor everynight training for his future as an adventurer) in my office which is a small room off our bedroom. the stench aweful - really it was like no words could describe. it was contained in the bowl provided and i quickly went to dispose. as i was coming back the monkey says "i lost my tooth" my reply "i didnt just flush it down the toilet, did i?". immediately i was trying to figure out if it was inappropriate to leave a quarter in the toilet for him in the morning. but no worries he had it in hand. whew. so the monkey is gap faced at the moment and has 1 week to self extract his other front tooth for the health of the tooth that has already come in behind it.
i have been working out again at the beautiful rec center. i have been lifting weights 3 times a week and riding the bike. training to roll with the cool kids of bike ypsi. i have come to accept that yoga, running and pilates are not my thing. they bore me really. i have found my groove and am rolling with it. it helps that the rec center is like a spa and i LOVE the in locker room hot tubs and dry sauna. it also helps that the last two times i was in the hot tub i was mistaken for a 20 and 23 year old by some older (50's) women. nice!
last update:we have been watching lost. we are through the second season and are starting season 3 tomorrow thanks to lovely wendy. it is a date night every night with lost. we snuggle up on the poof chair and watch 2-3 episodes. and i somehow kick the PSII remote (we use the PSII for the dvd player) and i either somehow put subtitles or a foreign language setting that we do not know how to undo. i find john locke to be personally inspiring. and makes me want to read john locke philosopher. i hear this is the addictive part of lost- all the little connections to this and that. how interesting.
i am writing this while watching (psudo-watching really) mythbusters and i just need to mention here that kari is a very attractive young lady. her bio photo is really cheesy and does her no justice- too done up.
AND most importantly MY BATHROOMS ARE DONE!!! wall paper gone (thanks to andy!) painted and decorated!!!!!! whooohoooo!!!
done with my catch up post. happy spring.
i am trudging through putting the next issue of The Birth Project together. i am trying a few new layout options (get a copy and check it out!) and i am dealing with temporarily not having access to the software i need on our new-to-us-used computer. i may mention here that i love and rely on technology but i hate it so. it makes my skin crawl. we have some really great pieces this time around. it will once again be a super "eeeeekkkkk" moment of excitement when we pick it up from out super awesome local printer.
the monkey has been getting nightly phone calls from a new friend of his that lives about a half hour from us, so we dont see them often enough, and the boys talk about their band that they are going to start. tonight it was decided that they will not form until christmas but will practice until then. it was absolutely adorable to eves drop on their conversation. the monkey was so geeked to be getting phone calls and it seems that this may become a nightly ritual. so cool. oh, the monkey is the drummer btw. sweet!
i measured the kids the other day and the bean has grown about an inch and a half since january. mind you in january i splurged and took the bean to value world and got her a garbage bag of new-to-her clothes and some of them are already too short. damn skippy! luckily i was prepared and bought some pants to roll up for now so they will fit in the fall. smart cookie i am.
on the homeschooling front- i swear february through april are a wash for me every year. i find also when i teach at work i am lack luster this time of year also. hmmmm..... maybe i am a bear and need to hibernate through these dreary months of torture. mind you we are having a record snow year for the first time since 1880 and it is supposed to snow this weekend (***sniffle***sniffle***tear runs down cheek) i am so done with this and so are the kiddos. we are all bouncing off the walls and dreaming of digging in the dirt (the beans favorite animal is the beloved worm) and growing and eating beautiful heirloom vegetables.
funny story: last week the kids had a big and the monkey threw up once (poor monkey) but it was the middle of the night and he saw it coming and mindfully asked for a bucket to have next to him just in case (always thinking ahead, that kid). when it did occur he was sleeping on the floor (he sleeps on the floor everynight training for his future as an adventurer) in my office which is a small room off our bedroom. the stench aweful - really it was like no words could describe. it was contained in the bowl provided and i quickly went to dispose. as i was coming back the monkey says "i lost my tooth" my reply "i didnt just flush it down the toilet, did i?". immediately i was trying to figure out if it was inappropriate to leave a quarter in the toilet for him in the morning. but no worries he had it in hand. whew. so the monkey is gap faced at the moment and has 1 week to self extract his other front tooth for the health of the tooth that has already come in behind it.
i have been working out again at the beautiful rec center. i have been lifting weights 3 times a week and riding the bike. training to roll with the cool kids of bike ypsi. i have come to accept that yoga, running and pilates are not my thing. they bore me really. i have found my groove and am rolling with it. it helps that the rec center is like a spa and i LOVE the in locker room hot tubs and dry sauna. it also helps that the last two times i was in the hot tub i was mistaken for a 20 and 23 year old by some older (50's) women. nice!
last update:we have been watching lost. we are through the second season and are starting season 3 tomorrow thanks to lovely wendy. it is a date night every night with lost. we snuggle up on the poof chair and watch 2-3 episodes. and i somehow kick the PSII remote (we use the PSII for the dvd player) and i either somehow put subtitles or a foreign language setting that we do not know how to undo. i find john locke to be personally inspiring. and makes me want to read john locke philosopher. i hear this is the addictive part of lost- all the little connections to this and that. how interesting.
i am writing this while watching (psudo-watching really) mythbusters and i just need to mention here that kari is a very attractive young lady. her bio photo is really cheesy and does her no justice- too done up.
AND most importantly MY BATHROOMS ARE DONE!!! wall paper gone (thanks to andy!) painted and decorated!!!!!! whooohoooo!!!
done with my catch up post. happy spring.
Monday, March 24, 2008
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
dinner
i feel a pot luck dinner party in my future. i put my fire pit together this weekend and gave it a whirl. so...... who is up for a spring dinner and fire???
(yes we have scrabble too ;)
(yes we have scrabble too ;)
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Thursday, March 06, 2008
Monday, March 03, 2008
Do's and Dont's of New Baby Care
I came across this blog post and for a brief moment thought of incorporating it into my Newborn Infant Care Class.
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Sunday, February 24, 2008
the ant and the sperm
there is an ant that likes to hang out on my bathroom floor. just one ant. he roams around on the same two tiles. he does not seem to care for company nor does he seem to have purpose. but he is there greeting me, with my pants around my ankles. it does not seem to phase him and i am glad to not interrupt his time. he amuses me and makes me think of spring. so the next time nature calls i can only hope my friend is there to greet me.
then there is my husband. the lover of science. he would be totally content living in the middle of nowhere with few humans around and those that were would need to be able to science speak. he with nature and a temperature controlled dome of reptiles, fish, amphibians and random cultures of wingless fruit flies and aquatic insects to feed to the previously listed specimens. but this evening my man of science was compelled to use his 7 year olds discovery channel microscope to view his own sperm. although the resolution was not great it did work. he was giddy and eager to share. i feel closer to my darling husband and his swimmers. it does make me wonder though all the households with kids microscopes how many have been used to view sperm?
then there is my husband. the lover of science. he would be totally content living in the middle of nowhere with few humans around and those that were would need to be able to science speak. he with nature and a temperature controlled dome of reptiles, fish, amphibians and random cultures of wingless fruit flies and aquatic insects to feed to the previously listed specimens. but this evening my man of science was compelled to use his 7 year olds discovery channel microscope to view his own sperm. although the resolution was not great it did work. he was giddy and eager to share. i feel closer to my darling husband and his swimmers. it does make me wonder though all the households with kids microscopes how many have been used to view sperm?
Saturday, February 23, 2008
spring is creeping in..maybe.
PUZZLE DONE!! now off to get puzzle glue and hang it on the wall. i have carried this puzzle around for 10 years started it 4 or 5 different times but with small kids it was not a good idea. so ten years later it is done and only one piece is missing.
the bathroom is sluggin along. i didnt touch it today. could not tear myself away from the puzzle.
my garden is on my brain. it will be a year of canning, freezing and tinctures. planning on how much we can grow and where. our soil is crap so i am thinking container garden and a lot on normal street.
i did find a meat csa that i need to follow up on. apparently you would get a mixed box of meat a month. (i just love the way that sounds ;) it is on my todo list to call calder and get on their delivery list. i have been doing door to door organics and i am going to hold on to that until the markets open. with the whole local thing i cannot imagine giving up bananas and avocados.
i did bust out my bread maker and for some reason it is making some poopy bread that turns into a cruton in 12 hours. so i have to dink around with that or just get into the old fashioned way of making bread. but the nice thing with the bread maker is that i can make pasta dough- another one of my goals. and super bonus the ypsi coop carries local (w/in 100 miles) flour. i still want to take my kids out there one day. it is about a 45 minute drive to linden mi but if i tie it into a visit to the fenton ladies then they will be all on board.
all this food talk is motivating me to do my pantry remodel i have wanted to do and i did buy an electric nail gun yesterday (for my mom) so we are good to go. all i need is my mason jars and freezer bags and a jug of five o'clock vodka (for tinctures).
i see a kitchen overhaul in the future but first things first - the bathroom.
the bathroom is sluggin along. i didnt touch it today. could not tear myself away from the puzzle.
my garden is on my brain. it will be a year of canning, freezing and tinctures. planning on how much we can grow and where. our soil is crap so i am thinking container garden and a lot on normal street.
i did find a meat csa that i need to follow up on. apparently you would get a mixed box of meat a month. (i just love the way that sounds ;) it is on my todo list to call calder and get on their delivery list. i have been doing door to door organics and i am going to hold on to that until the markets open. with the whole local thing i cannot imagine giving up bananas and avocados.
i did bust out my bread maker and for some reason it is making some poopy bread that turns into a cruton in 12 hours. so i have to dink around with that or just get into the old fashioned way of making bread. but the nice thing with the bread maker is that i can make pasta dough- another one of my goals. and super bonus the ypsi coop carries local (w/in 100 miles) flour. i still want to take my kids out there one day. it is about a 45 minute drive to linden mi but if i tie it into a visit to the fenton ladies then they will be all on board.
all this food talk is motivating me to do my pantry remodel i have wanted to do and i did buy an electric nail gun yesterday (for my mom) so we are good to go. all i need is my mason jars and freezer bags and a jug of five o'clock vodka (for tinctures).
i see a kitchen overhaul in the future but first things first - the bathroom.
Friday, February 22, 2008
mid-winter
february in michigan is brutal.
so i have started a 1500 piece puzzle. ( a few weeks ago actually but i feel like i have hit the good mojo on it) and i have begun the redecorating of my bathroom. the removal of the wall paper has begun. painful as it is. it is moving in the right direction. stacey, in all her lovely self, helped me remove the wall paper we didnt get it all but go most. we will be hacking away at it again tomorrow, then hopefully we will bust out with the painting. pumpkin but the bean disagrees so we shall see. then it is off to remove the beans bedroom wallpaper and the family room wall paper. i love stacey being off of school this semester! i will get my house done. yay!
so i have started a 1500 piece puzzle. ( a few weeks ago actually but i feel like i have hit the good mojo on it) and i have begun the redecorating of my bathroom. the removal of the wall paper has begun. painful as it is. it is moving in the right direction. stacey, in all her lovely self, helped me remove the wall paper we didnt get it all but go most. we will be hacking away at it again tomorrow, then hopefully we will bust out with the painting. pumpkin but the bean disagrees so we shall see. then it is off to remove the beans bedroom wallpaper and the family room wall paper. i love stacey being off of school this semester! i will get my house done. yay!
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