ok, it is not really that i hate toilets, i hate cleaning toilets. i would much rather dig a hole in the yard and stick a box with a hole over it. when it starts to funk fill it in and dig another.
yes i admit in the winter it may be a little drafty on the bits but i am ok with that if i do not have to clean the porcelain crusted with dried urine from my ill-aimed boy child and dried poop splatters from the intestinal explosions that occasionally visit our family members.
but the birthday party is coming and clean toilets must be had so i get on my knees and bow down to the porcelain thrown and do my duty as a good house wife, scruba-scrub-scrub. (i really have to laugh at calling myself a house wife- it just does not fit. how about house diva. i like that. i do sing my songs of hatred while i clean so it would fit. or house goddess. or house master. or she who do-ith all. or mama on the edge!)
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